Two today!

Yes, that's right!

Two new entries in one day :-)
('Reality.' and 'The Story. The Tapestry. The Beauty.')

Consider leaving a comment, shooting us an email (ta.wolfe@hotmail.com), writing us on Facebook, whichever way you wanna do it...let us know if you are reading this blog! We would REALLY appreciate it.. (and while you're at it...let us know what you think of it...what is happening in your life...what God is teaching you...anything!)

It is always so encouraging to hear from you, and to know who we are speaking to through our blog.

=)

And something to make you think:

"Where your talents and the needs of the world cross lies your calling." {Aristotle}

Reality.

What is your reality?

Let me tell you about someone else’s reality. A lot of someones, actually.

Reality for a group of class 7 boys. A free HIV/AIDS clinic comes to the slum. You can get tested. You can know your status. Scary thought when you really don’t know what the outcome will be. When you know that there is a possibility that you are HIV+.

I walked into the class 7 room to see a bunch of boys holding yellow cards and discussing something amongst each other in Kiswahili. They each excitedly held out their cards to me and said “I’m negative!!” The joy. If I could express to you the joy in their voices. And on their faces. “I’m negative!!”

One boy told me that this is the fourth time he has gotten tested. “And I’m still negative Andrea!”

Another boy said that this was his very first time. “And I tested negative, Andrea!!”

I told each of them how happy I was for them. It was an exciting occasion for these.

But what about those who’s result wasn’t what they wanted to hear” To see on their yellow card “HIV+”?? What about those? Their reality will be the fact that they now have to live with this awful disease. They now have to live with the shame. With the disgrace. What about their reality?

There is a small boy in the nursery class. His name is John. He is six years old. He has AIDS. John is so sick. They fear he is in the last stages. He barely eats. His father refuses to take care of him. His mother passed away a few months ago. John is dying. What about his reality? He did nothing to deserve getting this killing disease. He was just born. Born to die. We all are, but not like this. It is difficult to even look at this boy. It is as though his spirit has already left. It is as though he has lost any will to live. It is as though this tiny little six year old boy has given up on life. What about his reality?

What about the two boys in class 6? Born with this disease. Having experienced much discrimination and disgrace already in their young lives, they know what it means to be shunned. To be unwanted. To be unloved. Because of a disease they did nothing to contract. What is going to become of them? What about their reality?

What about those girls who get raped? Many by people in their own family. What about them?? Getting abused is awful enough, but what about when the attack gives them a disease? A disease like AIDS? Their lives have been forever altered. Their future has been forever changed. What about their reality?

Think about your reality.

Think about the reality of these children in this slum.

Please, please remember to pray for them.

The Story. The Tapestry. The Beauty.

It is August 2002. Trevor and I meet for the first time at Eagles Nest Bible Camp. We have both worked at this camp before, but this is the first time our paths have crossed. We see in each other a love for kids and for ministry. Our friendship begins.

And the tapestry has been started.

Jump ahead 3 years to May 14, 2005. We commit our lives to each other in marriage, not having any idea what God has in store for us. We are giddy and happy and so excited for what the future holds. Meanwhile, God has orchestrated our lives to fit together for purposes we could not have imagined.

It is now a few months after our wedding day. It is Missions Conference weekend in our Church. God speaks to both our hearts, and we commit to God “Wherever. Whenever. Whatever.” We don’t really have a clue as to what this will mean. But we say that we are willing to do whatever He may ask of us.

Unknown to us, He is constantly working on this tapestry, weaving the details in ways that only make sense to Him.

It is January of 2006. A Kenyan family has started attending our Church, and they are talking about taking a group of people back to Kenya with them to help in an orphanage. We wonder “is this what God spoke to us about??” We are so excited, and join the group.

Now, September, 2006. We have spent three weeks in an orphanage in Kenya. We loved deeply and completely. We also hurt deeply and completely. Something happens in both of our hearts during that time and we sense a strong assurance that we will be back. We just don’t know how or when or where.

And God is still working.

Missions Conference 2006. God has a way of using these weekends to speak to us, we realize. After a particular Sunday night session, God reveals to us His call in our lives to over-seas missions. We are scared, terrified, frightened, excited. This is it.

It is a few months later. Seven months, to be exact. May 2007. We apply with Africa Inland Mission. We say that we are looking into going to Africa for maybe three months. Or maybe six. We have an interview and our provincial mobilizer asks us if we would consider going for a year. A whole year? We pray about it. And agree. Still not knowing what we will be doing. Or even what country we will be going to. But we are excited.

We have months of waiting. Of paperwork. And applications. Stuff we don’t enjoy doing at all. We are tempted to give up and just stay home. But God doesn’t let us. And so we press on.

Missions conference 2007. We are encouraged to give our all to Christ. Our whole lives. Our whole being. It is just the encouragement we need to keep going.

November 2007 we hear about a possible placement in Nairobi, Kenya. Trevor working as a mechanic. I could get involved in youth ministry. It sounds so great. (even though we don’t want to live in the city, we think we could do it for a year..)

It is December 2007 and Kenya has elections. The following months leave Kenya in turmoil and trouble. They call it “post-election violence”. AIM calls it “possibly unsafe for you to come to Kenya at this time”. We are confused. We felt so much peace to come to Nairobi. What are we supposed to do? We tell AIM that we would still like to come to Nairobi if it is at all possible. Please just let us come. And so they do.

It is September 10, 2008. We leave home. We leave family. It is hard. We begin to wonder what we got ourselves into. We don’t know if we are cut out for this.

The next couple of months are so hard. I don’t have a placement. I don’t have very much love for Kenya. I am so disappointed. Trevor, meanwhile, loves his new job. He gets into his ministry very quickly. He find fulfilment. He feels like he could do this forever. I can’t wait for our year to be done. Little do we know how He is using this to teach us and create intricacies and designs which will only be beautiful later. At this point, we feel like this is a mess. We are a mess.

It is January 2009. We have survived our first Christmas away from home. Away from our country. And something changes. January brings about new life in our hearts and attitudes. It is like we have changed. Especially me. I get involved in ministry in the slum. I see a bit of God’s heart for the children living there. And my heart breaks. And my attitude changes. I can start to see why Trevor wants to do this forever.

We continue to get asked if we are coming back to Kenya after our year commitment is over. We say we don’t know. We say that it’s a tough decision. We say that God hasn’t shown us yet. But deep in our hearts, we know the answer. How could we not come back? But the thought is just so scary to say out loud. So we don’t.

It is June. Trevor gets asked officially if we will consider coming back to Kenya full time. It still sounds so scary to talk about. Such a big commitment. Such a drastic decision. But we know. We’ve known the answer all along. God has been preparing our hearts for so many years and we’ve just been too afraid to take the next step. To follow him completely. To run after Him wholeheartedly. We have been so afraid. So we decide to say yes. It is so scary. It is so exciting. It is so overwhelming. And yet it is so peaceful.

And we are given a glimpse of the beautiful, intricate work God is making of our lives. And it amazes us.

It is the day after our big decision. Satan comes after us. He discourages us. He frightens us. He tires us. He bombards us with doubts. With questions. With petty things that cause us to fight and disagree. He threatens disunity in our marriage. He discourages us in our ministries. We realize what this is and ask people to pray for us. The funny thing is that the very things that satan is trying to use to destroy us are the very things that make us want to be strong. To hold to our decision. To keep our eyes on Christ, no matter the cost. But this battle goes on for months. And we are a mess.

We decide to extend our year commitment by three months. We feel that God is not finished with us in Kenya. We need to stay longer.

It is July. And August. And September. While we are still struggling, we have peace. God is bringing new friends into our lives. God brings us closer to our cell group where we meet with Kenyan friends our age and discuss the Word of God. God gives us a Church family. Not just a Church. But a family. In the midst of the storm, God calms the waves.

And now. It is October. 2009. We have grown to love Kenya. We have grown to deeply love the Kenyan people. We have made very close friendships. We have fallen in love with our ministries. We feel fulfilment. We feel contentment. We feel that we are home. We both do. God has done different things in our hearts, but our stories are intertwined. We are at the same place.

Trevor has built strong, deep ties with his Kenyan co-workers. He has given new life to the shop. He has put his heart into it. Sweat. Blood. Tears. And has seen results. The difference is noticeable. The vision is sparked. The future is bright. The excitement is high. It is more than just a repair shop. It is a place of relationships. It is a place of restoration, but not just on vehicles. It is a place of great potential. It is God’s work. And Trevor is His more-than-willing vessel. It is exciting.

Mitumba slum. The place I have lost my heart. It may be with the girl who has lost her parents who now calls me Mom. It may be with the boy who is HIV+ and struggles every day. It may be with all the youth who inspire me with their questions and commitment. It may be with that little baby who begs for me to hold him. It may be with all those kids who’s parents abuse them every day. It may be with the kids who don’t have enough food to eat. The truth is, each of these and more holds my heart. And I don’t even want it back. I love this place. My heart loves this place. But my heart is also broken by this place.

Now. Only six weeks left. We feel a sense of panic. It feels wrong. We can’t be leaving yet. It’s too soon. We love it here. We are meant to be here. This is where we belong. And yet we know that the same God who has orchestrated our lives from the beginning, the God who sorted out all the problems, the One who showed us His plan piece by piece, the One who not only sees the big picture and gives us a small glimpse of it, but who also takes care of meeting the smallest of our needs….HE is the One who is in control!! He is the One who understands. He is the One who will bring us back to Kenya in His time. He knows! And it is in this that we find peace.

It is in Him that we find peace.

This tapestry God is creating is far from finished. And at many times looks far from beautiful. From where we sit, it looks like a mess. Like it doesn’t make sense. But God in His grace has allowed us a glimpse a time or two. Just a glimpse. He is creating beauty out of our mess. He is creating loveliness out of our confusion. He is creating splendour out of our pain. He is the Master Designer.

It is in Him that we become beautiful.

Rain in Kenya

Growing up on a farm, I got to experience the need for certain weather. Needing rain for the crops. Needing sunshine so the crops would dry. Praying for the snow to hold off for only a few more days so that the fields could be cleared. Knowing that nasty weather could cause the newborn calves to die (or at least freeze off their tails and ears).

And yet, there was never a time where the weather caused us to starve. Or go without food for any length of time. Or caused our animals to starve. There was never a time where we needed rain for our very survival. Nobody in my family ever died for lack of rain. None of my neighbors ever suffered to the point of not being able to feed their children because of a drought. Do you get what I'm saying? To pray for rain because your survival, and the survival of your family and animals depends on it. To be desperate. To need it.

Kenya has been crying for rain. Kenya and her people have been suffering. Kenya's people have been dying. There are some places, especially in northern Kenya, where all the goats and sheep have died a long time ago, and now the camels are starting to go. When the camels start to die, you know there is an intense lack of rain. Lack of rain= lack of food. It's a terrible problem.

But...God has been answering the cries for help, and we have been receiving wonderful, wonderful rain! It is finally raining in Kenya!! There is just something about the joy on people's faces when the rains come. Such a direct answer to prayer! Please continue to pray for rain all over Kenya...not all of Kenya is receiving this blessing yet.

On that note as well though...we are also expecting to experience an El Nino to strike Kenya sometime soon. This would not be a good thing. Words like: torrential rains. flooding. washing away the topsoil. evacuations. drowning. These words are being used to describe the effects that this El Nino could have on Kenya. So please pray for "good" rain in healthy doses. People still talk about the last El Nino that hit Kenya, and it was a terrible time. So we need your prayers.

We are learning what it means to truly rely on God...and what it means to truly praise Him. Our God is mighty!! He is Mighty to Save.

Everyone needs compassion

A love that's never failing, let mercy fall on me
Everyone needs forgiveness
The kindness of a Saviour, the hope of nations

Saviour, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save, He is mighty to save
Forever, author of Salvation
He rose and conquered the grave, Jesus conquered the grave

So take me as You find me
All my fears and failures, fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in, and now I surrender, I surrender

Saviour, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save, He is mighty to save
Forever, author of Salvation
He rose and conquered the grave, Jesus conquered the grave

Saviour, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save, He is mighty to save
Forever, Author of Salvation
He rose and conquered the grave, Jesus conquered the grave

Shine Your light and let the whole world see, we're singing
For the glory of the risen King, Jesus
Shine Your light and let the whole world see, we're singing
For the glory of the risen King
{Hillsong}

The Trip

Where to begin? It’s been a long time, and feels even longer since I last wrote here. I have realized a few things about myself these last few weeks, one of them being the fact that even though I do not consider myself a planner or organizer, I do need preparation time. I always thought I was more of a “spur-of-the-moment” kinda girl than I actually am.

Leaving Kenya so quickly was rough. We felt as though we were in a fog for a good portion of our time in Canada. It’s like we were in a different place physically, but our minds and hearts couldn’t quite catch up. One day we were doing the “Kenya thing” and the next we were on a plane bound for the North American continent. Strange, strange feeling. One I wouldn’t recommend.

We were really thankful that we made the decision to go home for Bobbi’s funeral, regardless of how strange it felt to be leaving Kenya. It felt like the right decision, and the chance to spend time with her family and the rest of my family, just remembering her, made it worth it. She was such a special person, and my childhood memories are filled with hilarious events and times of exaggerated imaginations with Bobbi. We had so many good times…my life was definitely sweeter because of her. The funeral and memorial services were hard, though. It made the events of the past week hit home. It was reality. Bobbi was really gone. I hate it. And yet I know that she is with Jesus. I know that her life here on earth was but a shadow of the life she has now. I know that she is Home. And yet it still hurts to have lost her here. Please continue to pray for her husband, Justin, and her parents, siblings, and nieces and nephews. She was deeply loved and is now deeply mourned by those who loved her most.

The rest of our time in Canada involved a lot of visiting with friends and family and a lot of eating of really good food! It was a good time of catching up and ended up being a time of refreshing in our hearts. We needed a break more than we even realized and God used this unexpected trip home to give us that. It also turned out that we were able to be home for our niece Halle and nephew Hosea’s birthdays, which was also really special. We had a lot of fun with different people, having coffee, hunting, an early Thanksgiving meal, visiting until the early morning hours, laughing, crying, and just enjoying the people that we love so much. And by the way…Canada is colder than we remembered…we have become complete wimps and consistently complained about the -2`C weather…!! =)

Trevor and I with our nieces, Makena and Halle

...and with our niece Samala, and nephews Jorrell and Hosea

Loramie (sis), Rea (sis-in-law), Anj (sis-in-law) and I

However, even with thoroughly enjoying the family, friends, food and fall season at home, we were ready to come back to Kenya. (and not just because of the warmth, either, although it sure helped!) We were really missing our friends, Kenya home, ministries, and just life here in Nairobi and most of all just knew that our purpose here in Kenya wasn‘t finished and we needed to get back to our normal life.
So on Thursday, October 8, our adventure back to Kenya began…

Seriously. Who ever said adventure was a good thing? We had one of “those” travelling experiences that make you just wanna say “are you SERIOUS??!” What a trip.

Every one of our flights was delayed. Every. Single. One. The first from Grande Prairie to Edmonton was delayed because of the weather. (we were home for the first snow storm of the year…yay!) So we waited in the GP airport for at least an hour. Then our next flight from Edmonton to London was rather nightmarish. We had boarded the plane, and were waiting to take off. And we waited. And waited. And waited. Till the captain made an announcement about the plane experiencing left engine failure. And that the mechanics were checking it out. Nothing like already being on a plane and realizing that you really are putting your life in these mechanics {hopefully} capable hands!! So we waited some more, only to be told that this was NOT something they could fix now and we would have to de-plane and wait for another plane to be brought in from Vancouver. Next departure time being 2:30 am. Awesome.

We were a little worried about not making our next connection from London to Nairobi, but thought, well, if this plane leaves on time, then that gives us a little over an hour in London, and we COULD make it. So we used our meal vouchers from the airline and had a nice meal at Chili’s and hung out in the airport for the next four hours.


But, you guessed it, another complication. We had boarded the second plane of the day in Edmonton. And waited to take off. And waited. And waited. And waited. Till the captain made another announcement “I’m sorry, ladies and gentlemen, we seem to be having another unusual problem with this aircraft…” wow. Seriously. Something about a problem with not having enough fuel to get all the way to London…

After a long few hour wait sitting in the airplane, we finally were able to take off. We arrived in London in time to see our next connection take off without us. Awesome. Too much confusion later, we ended up in a hotel in London for the night.

Welcome to rainy London...

waiting for the train at London Heathrow Airport

The next morning we took a bus back to London Heathrow, then a train to our terminal. After we had boarded our plane….oh yeah, another delay. This time it was something to do with the runway. The lady sitting next to me, after I told her about our previous flight issues, said “then this is your fault. It’s something about you that’s making this plane delayed too. You’re bad luck.” Thanks, lady. That makes me feel so much better.

But we arrived safely in Nairobi, which in itself felt like a miracle after the frustrating experiences of the last few days! 10:00 pm Saturday night was a welcome time!! Hello Kenya! But the “bad luck” didn’t end with coming to Kenya, apparently. Our luggage decided to stay in London. Of course! We just had to laugh. Seriously. It would have been too good to be true had something actually gone right!! We did all the necessary paperwork at the baggage claim, and then had two wonderful friends come and pick us up at the airport. Thanks Saks and Dann!! =)

So now…Trevor’s bag has arrived…and mine is still who-knows-where! I’m trying to have a good attitude about it. It’s just stuff. Just possessions. Nothing that really matters. (do you hear my trying to convince myself?! Ha) but really, God has been showing me a lot of things in the last few days and making me realize what is truly important. So I’m trying to see it from His perspective.

We are now trying to get over jet-lag and enjoying the wonderful Nairobi weather!! It’s been so good to see all our friends again and get back into “Africa-mode”. More updates to come soon.

God is good.